Sunday, October 16, 2005
hmmz...seems tis week is another challenge for me to take...zzz...zzz...yup...him again...-.-" while i was trying hard to forget him...he seems to knew it...n pull my soul back...y.y.y.y..y??? on mondae...he ask mi out for a tok...it was...torturous...cruel is the fact...i cant believe wad he said is truth...really had a brkdwn...i felt so ...helpless...nuisance...n useless too...i cant help anything to it...u noe the pain of it?...i leave without letting him to explain it all...i dun wan another slash in my heart...it bleeds...really...
the whole night was a living hell for mi...i cant get into slp...was tossing here n there...thinking a solution to it...but it seems...i really cant help it...tis he had to settle it himself...all i noe is to pray tat everything is fine for him...
i went out everyday this week...from early in the morning to night...i couldn't think of staying at home...probably gone mad...life's short ya? y not go for the happy path...instead of torturing yrself...it would feel gd anyway isn't it?...
had an eye opener tis week...my dad bring mi to an old street at some corner of s'pore...those ppl were in old n torn clothings...hair's messy n some sort of beggers in the street...they were selling 2nd hand goods...n some stuff tat were thrown away by ppl...ya...tat's their life!...compare to mi...i was much much better than them...i had no worries for my 3 meals full...my comfort clothings were bundled...n had endless to spend...but wad make mi sour in heart is...despite of theirs beggers life...they seems content in life...there are still smile in their faces...tat was wad i'm ashamed of...my dad told mi this 'zhi zu zhang le' which means if u want everlasting happiness in life u had to be contented in things u do...becoz u are contented then u will find happiness...
had learnt a great lesson after every outing with my dad...sometimes we juz needs someone to tok to...then we can manage things out properly...
haas...found myself a job recommended by a fren...it's a factory job...zzz...seems to become robot when start to work...coz it's non-stop! until the 15mins brk then can had a rest...15mins...-.-" 5 mins for toilet brk...the rest of 10mins...can do wad? shoot bird oso nt enough la...zzz...after the long long hours of working...go home still needs to suffer again! cant slp...really cant...the pain...living hell man! zzz...dad & mum seems getting worried as i kept moaning in the middle of night -.-... cuts in the hands were everywhere...aww...pain! freak to it... intend to get another job since mum suggested to it ...learnt another lesson againz... hmmz...wellz... life's short... do wad im happy with... n contented is the main key now... nth could stop it!!! =P my way, my life! coz tat's mi~ *winks* hahaz...ok...end here~ take care all frens n miss u lotsa!....
[..[.be.contented.]..]
Sunday, October 16, 2005
